b:includable All Tea, No Shade | Creme de la Chic: All Tea, No Shade

All Tea, No Shade

2.07.2015




What is the quintessential meal to steal your heart in London? Easy. It's afternoon tea.

"The way to my heart is through my stomach".Whoever conjured this brilliantly accurate proverb was probably referring to food fanatics like me. Traveling = devouring everything within arms reach and subsequently and justifyingly walking it off. (Thanks Citymapper for including the calories I burn when walking to my destinations) No wonder why Europeans tend to stay skinny compared to us, "Umericans" who will literally drive down one block.

After excavating and endlessly thumbing through neverending Yelp reviews at 2am, I'd like to say I've become the master of afternoon teas in the London area--well, for a novice American tourist, that is. Decrypting sketchy Yelp reviews and abandoning my refined list of £ - ££ price list miraculously landed me to Bond & Brook.

Once Jeremy, Dionna and I maneuvered through the congested streets of Oxford Circus like Pac-man after a brisk escapade to probably THE biggest Topshop of mankind, we discovered the tucked away restaurant at Fendwick. Fendwick = a hybrid of Nordstrom and Saks Fifth Avenue. Sidenote: Oxford street is pretty much the hub of tourists, so if you're already anxiety-prone and crowd-avoidant, this ain't the place to visit. Call it the Times Square of New York. (I'm making a lot of New York comparisons, I know). 

Random note: The Oxford Circus Topshop even has Lola's Cupcakes, a Boba Bubble Tea mini shop, and even a Tattoo & Piercing floor. Ya know, because why not get some high-waisted faded denim and a jumble of cartilage piercings to complete that low-key hipster look? *Sarcasm mode in full effect*

After attempting to maturely and importantly state my last name for my reserved table, we were all seated alongside champagne bottles and a bookcase of fashion coffee books. Listen, you know when a place is fancy if the floors are marble and the lamp looks like something straight out of a modern art museum. 

So what did I get for my first-ever, bucket-list afternoon tea? 
The Afternoon Tea á la Palace English Breakfast Tea, of course! (I only chose Palace because it sounds elegant. no shame.)
Freshly baked scones with "clotted" cream and homemade strawberry jam lovingly tucked inside a fabric blanket? Yes, please! *Cue the allusions to Tyra Banks ravenously inhaling slices of butter and steaming bread in Lifesize, the movie*

An array of delicate finger sandwiches and smoked salmon topped with caviar channeled my inner Marie Antoinette---minus the unsanitary, Marge Simpson-esque hair. I lost both my caviar and afternoon tea virginity so I'd like to think today was a pretty life-changing, eventful day when it comes to the daily life of Kelly Han and her cuisine endeavors. And the couture cakes? The name pretty much sums it up. 

Anyone that thinks afternoon tea is light, is probably a world professional competitive eater. Tip: don't even lick a crumb before tackling on afternoon tea. You will leave with a 3-hour food coma and a smug smile of sheer happiness because of how happy your soul & stomach will be. It's that filling. It was even worth the secretive snickers of the waitresses behind my back when my blogger mode was activated and I snapped "artsy" shots while my tea was continuously getting cold. Come on, we all do it. It's like the silence before the storm. The storm of destroying your food, that is. 

31 comments :

  1. Yummy!! This looks amazing. Afternoon tea is my downfall. Your photography is beautiful too!!

    www.whatsasssays.com

    Love Sass xxx

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  2. I love tea time and this is perfect for girls tea time.

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  3. Oh my, those pictures look delicious! I'm loving your photography!

    Ree // coffeewithree.com

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  4. Oh my god! These pictures are so beautiful and I am sitting here starving for pastries now! The title of this post made me laugh aloud! I love that. Some Ru Paul realness?

    Miss Anna Rebecka

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  5. Great post, and these photos are just beautiful. All of that food looks really delicious!

    Katie
    http://www.theaisleofstyle.com/

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  6. that looks so yummy! I had afternoon tea for the first time last June and i fell in love! x

    http://rawrbows.blogspot.co.uk

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  7. Looks so yummy and pretty!
    xx Elle

    New outfit post up on:

    www.cherryblossomstreet.com - Swedish Fashion Blogger and Model in TOKYO

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  8. The pictures are totally stunning, can't take my eyes of all this deliciousness!

    much love xxx
    CHRISTINANISTA.COM

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  9. Soooooo beautiful and tasty!!!!!! Wonderful photos!!

    WWW.LIAKW.COM

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  10. I have ordered things before that just sounded fabulous so I get you ha! Also, I'm absolutely in love with the photos you took because they can easily be used for an editorial campaign. So, so pretty.

    xo naomiinwonderland.com

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  11. Love this! ♥

    adoorablee.blogspot.com

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  12. That all looks so lovely! What camera and lens do you use by the way your pictures are AMAZING!

    www.georgiajade.com

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  13. So delicious...love afternoon tea's

    http://www.fashionpumpkin.com

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  14. Yummy! Such delicious treats.
    <3
    katsfashionfix.blogspot.com

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  15. Everything looks delicious!

    http://www.notesofglam95.blogspot.it/

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  16. Everything looks so good :)

    http://floralsandsmiles.blogspot.ca/
    twitter.com/floralandsmiles

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  17. Wow, beautiful pictures! I love afternoon tea too :) I'm following your gorgeous blog on bloglovin'! Have a nice day, xx

    Beyond The Velvet | Beauty, Fashion & Lifestyle Blog

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  18. These photos are so gorgeous!

    Heidi
    www.wishesandreality.com

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  19. What a fun way to spend an afternoon! I went to a afternoon tea party one time and it was so fun and different. Your pictures are absolutely stunning!

    Shannon
    Clothes & Quotes

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  20. omg!!!! such beautiful picturesssssss!!!! awesome

    xx

    isa

    www.un-likely.com

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  21. Amazing pictures! Seems like you had an awesome tea time! =)

    NEW POST on http://whattostyle.blogspot.com/

    xoxo,
    Jessica

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  22. I want to go to London so bad! I have never traveled to Europe before and am getting the travel bug so bad. I love your style and your pictures, they are beautiful. Following you on instagram, you have a gorgeous feed !! <3

    Emma
    www.emmacristy
    @emmacristy

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  23. Every picture spells "YUM!' Reading right now is giving me cravings.
    You have beautiful post, glad we bumped in.

    xx
    Giana.LDS
    www.ledesociale.com

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  24. that's seams so good:)
    miam!
    xx

    http://Sapetoibien.blogspot.com

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